It was a lovely day in Santa Clara and many people were walking, skating, riding bicycles, and feeding the birds in the park across the street from the school. My name is Nutty J. Squirrel but most folks just call me Nutso. Please feel free to call me that too.
Well, on this particular day while watching for a squirrel feeding person, a man sat down on the bench right under my tree. I was watching him very carefully because many people that sat there fed me.
This guy was definitely not the least bit interested in me or anyone else there. It was like he was wrapped up in his own world and seeing something in his head that no one else was privy to.
Before long, like a man with money in the bank, he began to talk softly to himself.
Just as I got close enough to steal his lunch and hear what he was saying to himself, I saw that he was writing what looked like a bunch of gibberish and making drawings that looked like a Martian picture. Along about now another man came along and sat down next to him. This man, looking like a college professor, said, "My name is Nosey Ned, but local folks just call me Nosey. What's your name?" Nosey asked him. The man just answered "Kent," without looking up from his papers.
After sitting there for a while without saying anything, Nosey, like a kid waiting to open a present, just couldn't stand it one more second and he asked, "Sir, you seem to be buried deep in thought and I wondered if, for my own curiosity, you would share what you are working on with me?"
Well our thinker said that it was a very hush hush secret invention and he really couldn't talk about it until the paperwork was finished and filed. When Kent finally stopped long enough to look up, he noticed someone peeping at him through some bushes and he asked Nosey if he knew who it was and Nosey just laughed and said "That's Peepers". He is a retired park ranger and he still keeps his peeps peeled to keep this park a safe place."
That seemed to satisfy Kent and he went back to work.
The next time Kent showed up at the park, he had a large suitcase with him and when he got to his favorite table he sat down and started to take small hand tools and materials out of the suitcase and place them on the big ole picnic table.
All of a sudden a sound like a bulldozer tipping over hit his ears and a red faced Peeps fell out of a tree right next to him. Peeps just mumbled something and left out of there as fast as he could.
Kent just acted like he hadn't seen a thing and kept on working. First he made a small clear plastic box and put something metal looking on the bottom of the box.
As he streched and yawned he noticed someone across the playground watching him through a pair of binoculars. He giggled to himself and said Peeps again. Just then Peeps came running out of his hiding place hollering like a madman and dove right into the lake. It seems that old Peeps had found a brand new yellow jacket's nest and more importantly, they found him. Kent was lost in thought and barely noticed the medics taking Peeps off in the ambulance.
Day after day Kent came back to his favorite table, he liked it because it was sitting off by itself so he could work without being disturbed. On this particular day Kent swore to himself that a small bush was moving around out there but he was too busy to pay it any mind, until he heard a voice hollering Ow, ouch, Ow, Ow.
Kent decided that he couldn't get much work done with all of this ruckus going on so he went to investigate. Sure enough, there was Old Peeps laying at the bottom of a hill all tangled up in the walking bush. Kent just shook his head and went back to work.
Every now and then Kent would stop working and kind of look out into space while he was thinking. To Peeps it looked like this secretive guy was looking at the kids in the school yard across the street. He felt in his bones that this weird guy must be up to no good and determined to keep his peeps on him even closer.
Now Kent cut out a piece of shiny metal and bent it in a cone shape and fastened it to stay in that shape. Inside of the cone he placed a plastic tube and some other stuff. It all seemed so mysterious and dangerous to Peeps. He just knew that this thing had something to do with those kids over at the school and he was gonna find out what.
That night after all the people went home, Peeps built himself a tree stand where he could have a real close look at this guy and whatever he was building. Early next morning, sure enough, Peeps put on his camo suit and climbed up into his tree stand. He just knew that today was going to be the day when he got this all figured out and nabbed this bad guy.
Well, this was the day when Kent was finally finished and he started to pack up his stuff to leave. Just then a blood curdling scream echoed across the park. Kent looked up and here came Peeps sliding down the tree, tearing bark off with his legs, still sitting in his tree stand seat. It seems that the seat came loose and down went ole Peeps, cradle and all.
Even though it looked quite painful, Kent couldn't help himself and he started laughing so hard that he had to sit down and wipe the tears of laughter from his face so that he could see old Peeps.
Peeps was sure that he had this guy dead to rights and he called a cop friend of his and asked him to come over and bust this creep.
When the two of them showed up, Kent smiled and said to Peeps, thanks for guarding me all this time so that I could finish my secret invention.
Secret Invention? Now Peeps looked sheepishly at his friend, officer IGotEm and shrugged his shoulders as though to say, I have no idea what this guy is talking about.
Kent said to Peeps, you have taken such good care of me that the first one of my inventions is for you. For me? asked Peeps. Yup, for you Kent said.
What is it Peeps asked, that was the question that Kent was waiting for. He nervously pulled the pieces out of the case one by one and assembled his device.
It looked kinda like an old RCA Victor phonograph without the dog but nothing moved. Kent, looking like the man who invented water, proudly said to them both that this is a portable Collapsable Solar Survival Apparatus. Kent explained that this is an oven, water distiller,a heater, and light directing device all in one. When it was all collapsed down it fit in the small plastic case he started with.
Well the guys were totally psyched and wanted to test this thing out right away. Peeps said he would go and get some burger and rolls and said we'll see if this thing is for real.
Kent assembled it in cooking configuration, pointed it at the sun, and as soon as Peeps got back the oven was ready and they really enjoyed their burger cooked by the sun.
Was there really a Kent and did he make such an apparatus?
Yes, and if you enter "Solar Hat" into the search window of your Encyclopedia of Solar Inventions you will see the actual expired patent papers for this device.
For decades now this device has been protected and saleable.
WhoWudda Thunkit?
